A talk given in Hindi on December 8, 2024
in remembrance of Suṣama dasi,
By Bhaktivedānta Madhusūdana Mahārāja
Suṣama devī dasi, a devoted worshiper of Śrī Lalita-Mādhava, Śrī Yoga-māyā, Śrī Kṛṣṇa-Balarāma, Śrī Rādhā Vinoda-bihārī, and Śrī Rādhāramaṇa bihārī's lotus feet, departed from this world on the 22nd of November, 2024, and entered into the Lord's unmanifested pastimes, aprakaṭa-līlā.
That which is eternal, it will never perish. That which is temporary, it will never have any permanent existence.
nāsato vidyate bhāvo, nābhāvo vidyate sataḥ
ubhayor api dṛṣṭo 'ntas, tv anayos tattva-darśibhiḥ
“Those who are seers of the truth have concluded that of the nonexistent there is no endurance, and of the existent there is no cessation. These seers have concluded this by studying the nature of both.” [Bg 2.16]
Of the sat, the spiritual, there is no nonexistence (abhāva), and of the asat, temporary, there is no existence (bhāva).
As we keep gazing, when will we forget this material body that we are looking at? This stage is called bhajana-siddhi (perfect systematic worship). After this stage, the aspirant knows his/her own spiritual identity. This is called svarūpa-siddhi. Finally at the end he/she achieves vastu-siddhi, or the actual perfection of joining the Lord’s eternal pastimes in a spiritual body
In his song Dekhite dekhite Śrīla Bhaktivinoda Ṭhākura sings:
dekhite dekhite, bhulibô vā kabe,
nija-sthūla-paricaya
nayane heribô, vraja-pura-śobhā,
nitya cid-ānanda-maya (1)
“When, before my very sight, will my bodily self-conception disappear? Then, with my own eyes I shall behold the exquisite beauty of Vraja, full of eternal spiritual cognizance and bliss.”
vṛṣabhānu-pure, janama lôibô,
jāvaṭe vivāha ha’be
vraja-gopī-bhāva, hôibe svabhāva,
āna-bhāva nā rahibe (2)
“At that time, I shall take birth in the village of Vṛṣabhānu Mahārāja, and my marriage will occur in Yāvaṭa. My sole disposition and character will be that of a vraja-gopī. Any other mood will not remain.”
nija-siddha-deha, nija-siddha-nāma,
nija-rūpa-sva-vasana
rādhā-kṛpā-bale, labhibô vā kabe,
kṛṣṇa-prema-prakaraṇa (3)
“When shall I obtain, by the power of Rādhā’s mercy, my perfected spiritual body, my perfected spiritual name, and my own form and dress—true initiation into the realm of kṛṣṇa-prema?”
yāmuna-salila, āharaṇe giyā,
bujhibô jugala-rasa
prema-mugdha ha’ye, pāgalinī-prāya,
gāibô rādhāra jaśa (4)
“When I go to draw water from the Yamunā, I shall understand the confidential mellows of the Divine Couple’s loving affairs. Being overwhelmed with prema, I shall sing Śrī Rādhā’s glories just like a madwoman.”
Whatever we fix our mind on in service, meditation, sādhana, contemplation; that is what we achieve through our svarūpa (one's original, spiritual form).¹
But we falsely identify ourselves with our gross material body.
When will we become so absorbed in our service and sādhana that we will forget our material bodies? When a snake sheds its skin and moves away, the discarded skin can look like a real snake to someone who stumbles upon it. Although the skin retains the shape of the snake, it is not actually a snake.
Just as a snake sheds its outer skin and continues on its way, when will we break free from our outer skin, completely forgetting our material condition? This can happen both to a sādhaka, or a practitioner in bhakti-yoga and to a siddha those who attain the stage of svarūpa-siddhi and enter to aprakaṭa-līlā, the Lord's unmanifested pastimes.
This forgetting of oneself is itself identification with that object (tād-ātma or becoming one with that object), and it happens in tan-mayatā (being as that). Many Gosvāmīs have expressed such devotional sentiments or bhava. Similar kind of feelings are described in the first verse of Vilāpa-kusumāṣjali:
tvaṁ rūpa-manjari sakhi! prathitā pure ’smin
puṁsaḥ parasya vadanaṁ na hi paśyasīti
bimbādhare kṣatam anāgata-bhartṛkāyā
yat te vyadhāyi kim u tac chuka-puṅgavena
“My dear sakhī Rūpa Manjarī, you are well known in Vraja for not even looking at the face of any man other than your husband. Therefore, it is surprising that your lips, red like bimba-fruits, have been bitten, even though your husband is not at home. Has this been done by the best of parrots?”
Here Rūpa Manjarī became so much tad-ātmā, meaning ‘one in heart’, with Śrīmatī Rādhikā that he forgot he is Rūpa Manjarī.
tan-manaskās tad-ālāpās, tad-viceṣṭās tad-ātmikāḥ
tad-guṇān eva gāyantyo, nātmāgārāṇi sasmaruḥ
Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam (10.30.43); Bṛhad-bhāgavatāmṛta (2.7.134)
“Those vraja-gopīs, who had fully given their hearts to Śrī Kṛṣṇa, would imitate His manner of speaking and His activities. Since they had offered their very souls to Him and always sang His glories, they completely forgot themselves and their family interests.”
When the mind, heart, intelligent, soul and life all get absorbed in Kṛṣṇa or Śrīmatī Rādhikā, one gets so immersed in their transcendental name, qualities, form, pastimes that one does not remember oneself, and does not even remember those who are connected to oneself. There is attachment, but one does not remember.
From one specific point of view, the perfected state of absolute oneness (advaita-siddhi) seems identical to prema-siddhi. However, the difference is that advaita-siddhas say that “you should become one with Brahman, become one form, merge into Brahman, get the same, but a devotee cannot be equal to or same (samatā) as "bhagavān.” Yet even without merging, one does not remember one's own existence. Therefore, Śrī Rūpa Goswami is so much absorbed in thought of Lord Caitanya Mahāprabhu, Kṛṣṇa and Śrīmatī Rādhārāṇī that while having his own form, a separate description of his form has not been given.
priya-svarūpe dayita-svarūpe prema-svarūpe sahajābhirūpe
nijānurūpe prabhur eka-rūpe tatāna-rūpe sva-vilāsa-rūpe
Caitanya-candrodaya-nāṭaka 9.39/CC Mad 19.121
“Indeed, Śrīla Rūpa Gosvāmī, whose dear friend was Svarūpa Dāmodara, was the exact replica of Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu, and he was very, very dear to the Lord. Being the embodiment of Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu’s ecstatic love, Rūpa Gosvāmī was naturally very beautiful. He very carefully followed the principles enunciated by the Lord, and he was a competent person to explain properly the pastimes of Lord Kṛṣṇa. Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu expanded His mercy to Śrīla Rūpa Gosvāmī just so he could render service by writing transcendental literatures.”
Rūpa Gosvāmī is separate and also not separate (from the Lord). In līlā, (divine pastimes) he assumes a separate identity, but he becomes so absorbed in tan-mayatā that even though his form is still there, there is only one.
The gopīs became so distraught that they began to act out Kṛṣṇa’s various pastimes, their minds fully absorbed in thoughts of their beloved. Deeply immersed in thinking of Him and maddened by remembering His pastimes, the gopīs declared to one another, "I am Krsna!" while their bodies imitated His way of moving and smiling, His way of beholding them, His speech and His other distinctive features.
kasyāṣcit sva-bhujaṁ nyasya, calanty āhāparā nanu
kṛṣṇo 'haṁ paśyata gatiṁ, lalitām iti tan-manāḥ
Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam (10.30.19)
“Another gopī, her mind fixed on Kṛṣṇa, walked about with her arm resting on the shoulder of a friend and declared, "I am Kṛṣṇa! Just see how gracefully I move!"
One gopī, tilting her neck, taking a piece of dry bamboo on her hand and placing it on her lips, perfectly imitated how Kṛṣṇa would play His flute while her arm resting on the shoulder of a friend.
When does everything become forgotten, as it did for Suṣama devī dasi while immersed in seva? The physical body fades from awareness, and we serve through our eternal form, our eternal body. The external aspect is bound to be forgotten, whether today, in 10 years, or in 20 years.
dekhite dekhite, bhulibô vā kabe,
nija-sthūla-paricaya
nayane heribô, vraja-pura-śobhā,
nitya cid-ānanda-maya (1)
“When, before my very sight, will my bodily self-conception disappear? Then, with my own eyes I shall behold the exquisite beauty of Vraja, full of eternal spiritual cognizance and bliss.”
As we perform our bhajans, we will forget our bodies and everything else which relates to material worldliness and enter deeper and deeper into this kind of a state.
Often, I found myself confused upon hearing her name, as some devotees referred to her as ‘Susama’, ‘Susharma’, or various other names. But if we look at it in the Sanskrit śabda, sound vibration, then actually her name is “Suṣama devī dasi”. Suṣama means “one who possesses such splendid or great beauty that she does not require any beauty aids, make - up or ornaments to enhance her exquisiteness”. In her beauty, there is no adulteration of any kind caused by the addition of another substance. Her beauty is devoid of any contamination. A lot of people put make-up on or wear colorful clothes to make themselves beautiful. On their hair they will put black on one side, blue on the other side, yellow on the other side. They do a lot of things to decorate and make themselves beautiful. But all these are artificial makeups. On the other hand, Suṣama means “one who is naturally beautiful”. When someone serves Thakurji, they don't decorate or make themselves separately beautiful. In their svarūpa, one's original, spiritual form, they are so beautiful. When gopīs ran to serve Kṛṣṇa, they didn’t put any make-up on. They ran in whatever they had on. Even if you apply a little bit of kajal ointment, it is enough. In that, everything is beautiful. Devotion is beautiful in itself. Service to Kṛṣṇa is beautiful.
Suṣamā Devī Dasi’s beauty shone through her service. Throughout the many years she was with us, she dedicated herself to serving Yogamāyā, sweeping the floor daily. At Kṛṣṇa Balaram Mandir, she also contributed immensely, crafting flower garlands and adorning Tulsi Devī during temple decorations.
And especially one thing I saw, however many years she stayed with us, maybe 12 years, 10 years, she never fought with anyone. Never from anyone any complaint came to us that she fought with someone. If someone tried to fight with her, she would never fight back and instead walk away. She never said anything about anyone. She never used to show off. She was very simple. She would sit there and do her seva. And she would take her prasaadam and go away. This was her attitude towards her Guruji also. Out of Gurudeva’s books, she has translated one or two of his books into Italian. One was Śrīla Rūpa Gosvāmī’s Śrī Upadeṣāmṛta and the other one was Śrīla Viśvanātha Cakravartī Ṭhākura’s Camatkāra-candrikā. And one another book she was translating but she could not complete it. I would like that the devotees who know Italian language should complete the translation of this book so that it can also be published. This will fulfill her wish. We could not believe that so suddenly she would go. For the Yogamāyā festival on the 2nd and 3rd of October she was here with us. She wanted to go. Because Vaiṣṇavas are svatantrā, independent we cannot stop them. When they want to go, they go. The Vaiṣṇava is transcendental and free from the laws of karma.
The Padma Purāṇa has stated:
na karma-bandhanaṁ janma
vaiṣṇavānāṁ ca vidyate
viṣṇur anucaratvaṁ hi
mokṣam āhur manīṣiṇaḥ
“A Vaiṣṇava does not take birth under the jurisdiction of karmic law. His birth and disappearance are transcendental. The wise have declared that the servants of Viṣṇu are eternally engaged in the liberated service of the Lord and hence are free from the laws of material nature.”
Vaiṣṇavas are not bound by their activities or forced to take birth. They appear and depart according to their own will. Suṣama Devī Dāsī, choosing to leave everything behind, left from this world by her own desire. People said, ”eat that, do that,” but she followed her own path. She served as much as she desired and ultimately reached her Gurujī. Today is her day—she has gone ahead of us and will guide us when we join her, when Gurujī calls us to him. And here, whoever serves Gurujī, Gurujī sees everything.
Saralatā or simplicity (freedom from mental duplicity) is the first qualification of a Vaisnava whereas duplicity or cunning behavior is a great offense against the principles of devotional service. Saralatā means vaisnavata, true saintly devotedness. And, vaisnavata means saralatā. Suṣamā devī dasi had all these Vaisnava qualities.
She had great love for Srimati Kṛṣṇapriya Didi. Everytime she came to see Didi, she would sit and talk a lot about doing this and that, and very humbly ask about her service. Didi had the same affection for her also. I never saw her quarrel with Didi or talking loudly to her. She would speak very softly in a very humble way, never in a threatening or stubborn manner. It is very rare to see such an attitude amongst foreigners. But there are some foreign devotees who are humble, and one of them was Suṣama devī dasi. As the name, so the quality; her beauty, devotion and brightness were all natural. Whatever service she did, no advertisement was seen in her service. Whereas we do some service, then we look whether someone is taking our picture or not, whether someone is posting it on Facebook or not. We do our service like this for our own benefit, worship and prestige.
Even while making flower garlands, we tie a single flower in it and then ask someone to take our picture to show off to others that I am making a garland and doing service. Whereas Suṣama devī dasi naturally did not behave like this. This mood is very rare, all these qualities are rare and none of them are artificial, it isn’t a drama (performance). For some, this is completely natural for them.
Suṣama devī dasi was very happy. She never spoke loudly to me either. She was always very simple. Which seva needed to be done she would immediately go running to do it. And, as soon as she hears that someone is asking for something, if there was some need, something lying somewhere she would be the first to run to get it. She used to run like this, even though her age must have been above sixty, not less than sixty seven, but even then the natural tendency in her seemed as if she was a 15-20 year old child. But many people are lazy, and they become even lazier as they age; however, at that age, she used to run around and serve energetically. She was very honest and pious. Despite being unwell, no one realized until the end that she was sick. Bodily diseases are the law of this saṁsāra, the cycle of repeated birth and death in the material world. It's Thakur ji's desire in whatever ways he keeps us in this temple-like body.There's always some kind of problem or disease in this body. But after having a sick body she never felt anything and never became worried or restless. Very simple and easy way she performed all her services!
Today is her day and the food offering has been made to Thakur Ji. After giving her Thakur Ji’s prasaadam, we will all honor it. She should attain a permanent place in Guruji's service. This is our wish for her at this occasion. The more we fulfill our Gurudeva’s heart desire, the more Guruji is pleased with us. What more can we say? Gaura premānande, hari haribol!
1. The Brahma-saṁhitā states, “That which you meditate on in your life of sādhana will be achieved in the perfectional stage” (yādṛśī bhāvanā yasya siddhir bhavati tādṛśī).
In his Prema-bhakti-candrikā, Narottama dāsa says, “sādhane bhābibe jāhā, siddha dehe pābe tāhā.” One should, therefore, continuously reveal to the Holy Name one’s desire for vraja-prema while chanting under the direction of Śrī Guru, Rūpa and Svarūpa Dāmodara, without offenses. As one chants in this way, the Holy Name will be merciful and grant one the perfection of vraja-prema, for the Lord Himself has stated that all perfections come to one by the grace of the Holy Name (ihā haite sarva siddhi haibe sabāra).
Translator: Sāvitrī dasi
Editor: Nandakumāra dasa